Tag Archives: God

Where the Imperfect and Perfect Meet

07 Friday Jun 2013

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Reflecting on Sunday mornings as a pastor, I know I try to recall all of the announcements, prayer requests and logistical worship comments. Guess what? Even with writing myself notes I still forget things.

Most of our churches are not crafted like a production. Sure, some larger churches with multiple staff are able to spend more time and focus on the entertainment value of worship. They are able to dedicate more resources on their worship.

Even then, it’s still not perfect. Imperfections are cast in the shadow of the entertaining spectacle.

As much as we hope to be, every one of us pastors must face the reality of our own imperfections. Each and every liturgist, usher/greeter, children’s time deliverer, acolyte, communion steward, choir member and musician are imperfect. A candle will fail to light, a name in Scripture will be mispronounced and the pastor will forget to lift up one of our ill friends during our time of sharing prayers.

Each week, we do the best we can to make sure the focus is on God and our relationship with the Divine. In the process, mistakes will be made. Yes, unfortunately, they will distract from our focus on God. Yet, we continue to do our best, work at our mistakes for the good of God, our neighbors and, of course, the good of ourselves.

No matter how mild or severe the mistake, here’s the thing: God is still present. God is still active. The Holy Spirit continues to inspire, and God is still worshiped. No matter what little (or big) mistakes we make along the way, God still loves us and showers us with grace. God will never fail to meet us as we worship no matter how bad the preaching, singing or praying is in our congregations.

The Spoon Theory and Churches

15 Wednesday May 2013

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SpoonPeople with chronic illnesses are familiar with the Spoon Theory, an illustration of restricted energy.  In her writing, Christine Miserandino describes her limited energy by giving her friend twelve spoons.  Each spoon represents an activity.  Simple tasks like getting dressed or making the bed can cost one spoon.  By the end of the day, no “spoon”, or energy, remains.

This illustration is a reminder that people with limited energy must make decisions on how they will spend their energy for the day.  If they push themselves too hard one day and run out of spoons, they must borrow against the next day, leaving less energy for tomorrow.

Similarly, some of our churches only have so much energy and resources.  Unlike churches that have huge membership or endowments – or unlimited spoons, small churches with limited resources have so many spoons for the day, week or month.  No longer do they have a plethora of liveliness and warm bodies like they did back in the 50’s or 60’s.

With only so many people to serve on a number of different committees, a small number of the lay persons in our communities will spend countless hours working on programs.  Eventually they will find burnout.

Which is why small or limited churches must remember they are human institutions filled with human bodies.  Even though churches and people are limited, God is not.  Therefore, this is a time for us to turn to God in discernment.  Instead of beating ourselves up wondering why we only have so much energy, we should ask ourselves “Where does God want us to spend our time?”

By this discernment process, we aren’t spending the energy and resources we don’t have and burning out our entire congregation.  Instead, we are focusing our time, talent and treasures in ways that God is calling us.

This may mean ending certain groups that have been a piece of the church’s life for the past 50 years.  A fundraiser that worked well for our church ten years ago may not be bringing in the money anymore.  Is it time to try a new way of raising funds?  It may mean restructuring the governing boards.  People in our churches will grieve old ways of being church.  They will lament as they discard of programs that their parents created.  But maybe by letting go, we can find new life.  Maybe it is like the Jesus story: when Jesus the Christ released his spirit, he found new energy through the resurrection.

Similar to a person with a chronic, energy-depleting illness, a small church is not a dead or dying church.  There is plenty of life in that congregation.  The Spirit’s breath continues to flow.  But before exhaustion takes away our breath, now is the time to stop spinning wheels and squandering energy and listen for the still-speaking God around us.

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Incomplete – Alanis Morissette

10 Wednesday Apr 2013

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Life isn’t a destination but a journey. It’s a journey which isn’t finished. We keep looking for the finish lines along the way instead of enjoying the scenery of the journey. This song is a beautiful reminder that we are all complete in our incompleteness, and God’s ok with this.

Still Part of the Same Body as Rick Warren

07 Sunday Apr 2013

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Today, I heard the news that Rick Warren’s son committed suicide.  I can’t imagine what pain a parent would feel upon hearing the news that his or her own son ended their own life.

Granted, I may not agree with many theological points that Rick Warren believes.  His style of ministering and preaching may not be my style.

But, without a doubt, he is a child of God just as you and I are children of God.  He is part of the same Body of Christ that we belong.  He is made in the image of God the way all of us are made in God’s image.  God loves Rick Warren as much as God loves all of us.  And on the other side of heaven, Rick Warren will be there along with all of us.

Right now, God mourns with Rick.  God cries with Rick.  God surrounds Rick and his family with love, grace, comfort and peace.

We are called to do the same.

Because there is a hole in the heart and spirit of Rick, there is a hole in our spirits as well.  Because we are all part of the same vine and branches, we feel the branch that has been lost because Rick’s son Matthew is not walking with us on earth.  We feel a tremor in the whole body because Rick and his family have experienced this loss.

I tire hearing some theological traditions that believe that suicide sends people to hell.  Suicide is a result of mental illness.  As depression is a health issue, it can consume a person so greatly.  People do not choose to end their lives because Satan or some “evil force” causes them commit suicide.  Because of body chemistry and hormones, depression grasps the emotions of a person and causes them to understand reality in different ways.   This is a scientific and medical reality.  So Matthew isn’t in hell.  Matthew is finally seeing God in God’s fullest.  Matthew is able to see himself as God sees him.  Matthew can experience God’s full love and grace.  And Matthew is still a member of the great Cloud of Witnesses who will welcome us as we transition from this life to the next.

May the Warren family feel God’s peace, love and comfort during this time.  We pray for all who are contemplating suicide tonight and those who experience deep depression.  Amen.

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Thinking Psalm 22

20 Wednesday Mar 2013

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Thinking Psalm 22

Some days we feel like God has forsaken us. When do we feel that God is so far from us? When do we feel that God experiences our suffering? Is Lent a time when we feel farther from God or closer to the Divine?

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What Does Failure Mean?

06 Wednesday Mar 2013

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thumbsdownThroughout my life, I’ve wondered if failing at something meant that I shouldn’t be doing it.

I failed my first time at my driver’s test.  The second time I passed without any issues.

I received a third place on my piano solo during my senior year of high school.  Each year until that point, I had received a first place.  This particular year, I was performing Clair de Lune.  Every day, I would practice at least an hour or so on the piece.  Months of dedicated rehearsal felt wasted.

I failed the first time I applied to seminary.  I doubted God’s call in my life.  It took me years to find the courage to reapply once again.  When I reapplied, I found the seminary to which God had called me.

I did not pass my second-year seminary oral examination during the first try.  I completely froze during the exam.  Oh how devastated I was!  I used the experience to become stronger in my oral delivery skills and think quicker on my feet.  The failure forced me into a time of reflection, challenging me on how dedicated I was to the call from God.  From that failure, I was called by God to walk with others who had experienced similar failures.

During each of those failures, I wondered if I should stop trying.  Maybe God was calling me in a different direction, and I was the one who was wrong in my perceptions.  There was great praying and reflecting after each incident.  Should I continue in the process?  We often think that failure is a mandate that we cease our efforts.

In my failures, there was also great lamenting and grieving.  My emotions swung high and low.  I found moments of hope and promise then moments of dead ends and finished desires.  When our dream fails, even temporarily, we forget that a piece of us dies with that failure.  Our journey through life includes the grieving process – a slice of life we hope to avoid.  At some point, we must acknowledge the sidestepping grief just delays pain as all of us will have our days of heartaches.

I don’t think God causes us to fail.  And I don’t think our self-worth is always the cause of the failure, either.  Many factors often determine whether failure happens – from the judge’s perspective, to where God may be calling us, to our shortcomings.

Each day we succeed at a variety of tasks, and each day we fall short of our expectations.  In our careers, we perform some tasks easily and achieving great results, and other tasks do not produce the tasks we expect.

I still find little failures in my life.  Should I continue to write when something is rejected or my last product was mediocre?  Should I try a project at church when it didn’t work spectacularly the first time?

And then I remind myself success is not how others adore my talents but my faithfulness to God’s call.  I’m working for God’s kingdom not my glory.  If I am called to write, and I write, then I am successful because I have completed what I’ve been asked to do.   If I live in a mindset of fear and despair that causes me to cease my efforts, then my talents have been buried, and there’s no chance they will multiply.

Something Greater – A Sermon on the God Who Expands Outside of the Box

04 Monday Mar 2013

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Image0255This sermon was delivered on March 3, 2013 at St. Paul United Church of Christ, Old Blue Rock Rd, Cincinnati.

During this past week, I watched the PBS documentary Makers: Women who make America.  Watching this program was a great way to usher in women’s history month which started on March 1.  This program documented the transitions, achievements and rights that women have accomplished in the past 60 years.

Did you know there was a time when women were not allowed to run in marathons?  I never realized the story of the 1967 Boston Marathon when Katherine Switzer signed up and ran the race.  Women were not allowed at that time to run in the marathon, and the race director tried to physically pull her out of the race.  Instead, she continued to run.  The men running along side of Katherine were so excited to see her in that race.  The call of God stirred inside of her, got her on that path and kept her running.  Because Katherine followed her call, more races became available to women.

As I continued to watch this documentary, I never realized how many limitations there were on women sixty or seventy years ago.  Sure – so many women were called by God to stay at home and take care of their children full time, a truly important and beautiful vocation.  But, there were so many women who were called elsewhere, maybe in the workplace or as social activists, other valid and genuine calling.  But sixty years ago – society frowned upon that.  As this documentary showed, jobs were primarily open to young, single women before they were married.  There were segregated help wanted ads – one list for men and one for women.  And jobs for African American women were even more limited – mostly to maids.  All of this opened my eyes to a world that I never had to live in, even though, now, I’m one of these women called outside of the box.

Maybe there are still small limitations here and there, but today women can honor the direction that God is calling them without society saying a definite no.

We’ve locked God in a box and have a very limited view of the Divine working in the world.  Even when society is becoming more relaxed, there are those of us who sell ourselves short even when we are being called to something greater.

I also realized that I was holding myself back in my younger days, not seeing that God’s dreams was bigger than human dreams.  During my senior year in high school, I gave a speech that would shock all of you right now: it was on “why women shouldn’t be pastors.”  Yes, looking back, it’s very ironic.  I’m sure I probably used the text from 1 Timothy 2 – that women should be silent in churches.  After taking various speech, acting and debate classes over the years, it was the only time I received a C on any speech.

In 1991, even I didn’t think it was possible that I could be a pastor.  I had squished God inside of a very small box.  As God’s ways are bigger than my ways and God’s dreams bigger than my dreams, God got the last laugh on that one.

By the time I was in my late twenties, my mind had not only changed about female clergy, but I could also tell that God was starting to call me in that direction.

But women clergy is still kind of something new in our culture.  While women really started becoming pastors in the seventies and eighties, I’ve had people tell me that they’ve never met a female pastor before.  It’s a joy to be a testimony on the still-speaking God in our world.

Reflecting upon this scripture today, I kept wanting to focus back on two particular verses: Isaiah 55:8-9 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord.  For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

What we often see are two opposing viewpoints using God.  Some would tell me that God’s ways are not my ways and I shouldn’t be a pastor.  They would quote the same 1 Timothy 2 text that I used in my high school speech to quiet me.  But what if God doesn’t take sides and God wants everyone’s voices to be heard?  What if God wants women to be pastors?

When I look at whether a group of people should have rights, I don’t just quote scriptures that limit them – whether it’s women, or racial minorities or when others have a different sexual orientation.  I personally base my ethical frame with these principles in mind: Is there Justice where everyone has the same rights and the same way to achieve?  Are all people being loved as we would want to be loved?  Are we giving others the same dignity we deserve?

I often think that if we are afforded certain rights, shouldn’t others have the same rights as we have.  People who are older or younger?  People who are gay or transgendered?  People who celebrate their faiths in other ways?

I also remember the scripture of the Syrophonecian woman that used her voice to stand up for her own dignity.   Even when Jesus felt limited by what people deserved love and grace, God was working through the voice of this woman to show a greater way of living.  And Jesus changed his mind.

I think about Mary Magdalene.  According to John’s gospel, she was the first follower asked to spread the good news of resurrection.  Yes, according to this gospel, it was a woman.  I think about Acts 2 and how women are called to prophesy.  I think about early church leaders like Phoebe and Lydia.

What great things are God calling us to?  What kind of world is God seeing that we can’t see?  Women can stay at home if that is where God is calling them.  Women can go into the workplace if God is calling them there.    Likewise, if a man is called to be home while his wife works, that is fine too.  Men can be nurses and secretaries like women can be doctors and CEOs.  There is something greater than our societal limits: it’s God’s call.

And many say that I’m being disobedient by standing up here today and being in this pulpit.  Even my 18 year old self would say that.  But what I didn’t realize at 18 was that God was bigger than a few Bible verses.  That God called both men and women into the pulpit and to teach in various contexts.

Women and minorities have had visions for years, vision and dreams that God has called us to.  But why do we hold back the dreams of others by holding back their rights?  Why should humans limit when God has called?  How does the Church still limit what God has called?  When we limit people we limit God’s action in this world.

For many of us who have felt limited by the church or a few doctrines or for those of us who have limited ourselves, we deny ourselves nourishment of social justice that everyone deserves.  Years ago, nourishment was denied when American society had separate water fountains or lunch counters or help wanted sections.   We have forgotten that all of us deserve these great things because we are ALL made in God’s image and that God’s ways are bigger than our ways.

It’s true that humans often place God in a box and sometimes it is done to control other people.  We, as individuals and the Church, can no longer place God in a box.  God is in all and around all and always present.  God is the God of resurrection and new starts.  And God will find a way to burst out of the box that we put Him… or Her… in.

In what ways is God calling you to new areas?  What kinds of things have you been called to – even though society still has certain expectations?  The God of great thoughts and dreams will walk with us as we follow our great call, leading us in new places that have been closed to us.

What Movies Gave, Oscars Took Away

26 Tuesday Feb 2013

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MH910216353Sunday’s Oscar performance was a spotlight shining on the differences between being marginalized and privileged.

Here are some of the ways Seth MacFarlane, the writers and producers of the Academy Awards distastefully chose to produce an evening intended to celebrate the accomplishments of artists.

People might say that MacFarlane was being an equal opportunity offender.  However, do we hear jokes at the expense of women as often as men?  Do we hear jokes from white people about white people as often as we hear them about racial minorities?  How about people who are Jewish, gay or overweight?  Are their lives joked about more about than people who are Christian, straight or thin?

The isms were solidly present within minutes of the broadcast.  MacFarlane performed a song about women being nude in movies.  He made a joke about a popular domestic violence relationship.  Then, over the course of the evening, he made jokes about women’s sizes and the way minorities talk (among other things, of course).

Abominable.

Sure that’s MacFarlane’s way, or at least that’s what people tried to tell me over and over.  I wondered why did the Academy choose to be represented by him?  Why did the producers of the show choose a person who will belittle people based on a number of various factors?

Again, as much as I love the Oscars, this year’s ceremony reflected greater issues in our culture.  For instance, when the media focuses on hair, makeup and wardrobe, we take the attention away from the reason that these artists are there: their brilliant accomplishments.  (Sure, we all love to dress our best, but criticisms do not have a place in dressing up to feel great.)

Throughout 2012, we’ve had some wonderful reminders that people of multiple races, ethnicities, genders, sexual orientations, looks and ages have such amazing talents.  We are reminded by these accomplishments and efforts that no matter who you are or what you look like, you are able to accomplish great things.  We had storylines that lifted the human spirit.  And, yet, the people holding these awards decide to hire a host and a team of writers.  It was this “creative” team who chose to demean those who were celebrated.

These movies and performances helped us in seeing God’s grace, God’s presence, God’s love and God’s image within ourselves.  Unfortunately, the ceremony to recognize gifts in film achievement was clouded by disrespect.  Sad.

Loving My Voice

18 Monday Feb 2013

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I have a funny relationship with my voice.

I’m not exactly happy with the sound of my voice.  There have been moments of absolute disdain that began from the sounds which come out of my mouth.

In the eighth grade, I had a teacher tell me how horrible my voice was.  I never bothered to act in high school because I hated my voice and assumed that everyone else hated it too.  I took a public speaking class in high school and still managed to squeak out an A.

Then I went to college.  For my first career, God called me into public relations, a vocation that people would surely hear the sound of my voice.  My college classes included Acting (again, I got an A), Voice and Articulation (which I got an A+) and Public Speaking (which, believe it or not, I got an A+ in that class, too).

Maybe I’m not as bad as I thought… Maybe…

And then God called me into the ministry.  There is no doubt that my voice will be used.  But there is doubt on how well I speak.  I think back through my past and critically analyze the many perceptions of the way I speak.

Over the course of my life, there are times people have praised me for the sound of my voice.  And then there are times people have critiqued the way I talk.  I know that when I get nervous, I talk fast.  When I get passionate, the tone of my voice goes up and down.

Like everything else, my speaking is a work in progress.

I don’t believe I’m monotone, and the text I write for the speech is fine.  But the nerves kick in and my voice can go in any direction.

And, yet, God has called me to use my voice.

Here I am, for the umpteenth time, watching A King’s Speech.  King George VI, also known as Bertie, is called to take on the role as monarch.  In his new position, he must make countless speeches.  But Bertie has issues with stuttering and wonders how he can be king with such an impediment.

God didn’t call Bertie based solely on his voice.  Through this calling, God brought people into his life to strengthen his voice.  And Bertie continued to work on his speaking as part of his answer to God’s call.

Granted, my speaking may not be quite a choppy as Bertie’s, but there are times I lose great faith in the sound of my voice.  There’s this tension I’m called to live into: working to improve my speaking yet loving the way I speak right now.  Sure, I know I can always grow as a speaker, and I must keep working on it.  But I know that I must love who I am at this very moment, that God has called me to be here whether or not I have a spectacular voice.

This voice has the potential to bring hope to those who are in need and words to challenge people into action.  If I silence this voice, so much that needs to be said won’t be spoken.  Words in an adequate or average voice is better than no words spoken at all.

Sure – I still wince each time I listen to a recording of myself, although I must admit that I have improved greatly in the past six months.  My challenge to myself is to love my voice – love the nasal sounds that it brings, love the pitch and tone.  For if I fail to use my voice, God is limited in this world.

In Christ’s Love – A Letter From a Ally

11 Monday Feb 2013

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Last night, I tweeted this:

“I’m a straight ally pastor who is here for you dealing w/#TheStrugglesOfBeingGay. God loves you just as you are! :)”

I received a few responses from people on Twitter.  I think they needed to hear that there are people of faith who support and love them.

How could I not tweet this?  Jesus the Christ loved everyone.  Am I not called to do the same thing?

But that’s not the only reason.

I have experienced the unconditional, steadfast love of God through my gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered friends.  They have been open to sharing Christ’s radical love.  And this has led me to becoming a straight ally.

Since college, I continuously have new LGBT friends coming into my life.  I’ve met them through friends, work and school.  Some of my dearest friends have come out to me since we’ve met, and others have come out years prior to our meeting.

This is what I would say to those of  you who are my LGBT friends in a friendship letter of love:

I think you are all so very brave to truly be the person God has made you.  And I am blessed by all of you in my life.

When I’ve been down, you have listened to me.  When I’ve been sick, you have brought me food.  You have prayed with me in times of trouble.  We’ve laughed together, and we’ve cried together.  You have encouraged me in my calling and been a huge part of my faith journey.

You are witnesses to the steadfast presence of Christ in our friendships and in this world.  You’ve extended hands of  hospitality and truly cared about me just as I am.

To my friends who identify as gay, lesbian, transgendered, bisexual, queer, asexual, questioning and fellow straight allies… thank you.

This is a letter of love back to you.  Our orientations and gender identities may be different, and I don’t know the true capacity of strife you’ve experienced in  your lives.  But I am proud to stand next to you and say we are all children of God, and we are all made in God’s image.  We all want joy in our lives, and we all want to be loved just as we are.

Thank you for inviting me to your weddings to see new covenants being made.  Thank you for breaking bread with me.  Thank you for allowing me to be a visitor in your homes.  My life is better because you are in it.

Love, Michelle

Now, to my friends who are still in the camp of “traditional” marriage (a.k.a. marriage between one man and one woman): I recognize that you will not all will agree with me.  Many just  aren’t there when it comes to expanding marriage, yet you treat LGBT people with respect.  I try to be sensitive about voicing my views to people who aren’t quite at the same place I am about gay marriage and various gay rights.  Experiencing new people and new situations takes a certain comfort level.  I highly encourage you to continue conversations with LGBT friends, and maybe your views on love, life and God will change.

And then there are people who are relentless about keeping love in a box: those who use the Bible against their fellow sisters and brothers.  I realize that standing quietly by and allowing seriously bigoted views to float through our atmosphere does not make sense anymore.  Allowing bullying and slanderous words should no longer be in our society.

I’ve heard from some people think that loving a person requires trying to change someone into becoming straight, and that being gay is not good enough.  So here’s what I’d like to say to these friends.  Here’s my letter to those who have closed themselves off from having unconditional loving relationships with their LGBT sisters and brothers:

I have to ask you a couple questions: How would you like it if someone wanted to change something about you that you could not change?  How would you enjoy living in a world where people didn’t love you for who you are.

You see, my LGBT friends are moral.  Extremely moral and kind.  They know Christ in ways that many bigoted people seem to miss.  They know Christ in ways that I have even neglected sometimes.  All they want is to have the same chances at love as you do.  And I’m sorry that those of you who are my close-minded friends have missed out on such love and beauty in your lives.

I also do not want my LGBT friends hurting anymore.  I want them to feel the same dignity you and I feel.  I want them to feel no shame.  I want them to experience the overflowing love of God.  And that is why I write to you today.

My prayers are that God helps you see people and the human condition in new ways – mostly so that you will have an enriched life full of overflowing love.

Love, Michelle

After watching Lincoln this weekend, I had to write this.  It came to mind that, generation after generation, some people feel the need to oppress others to keep their status of life more valid.  What happens when slaves are freed – will they get to vote?  What happens when they vote – will women get to vote?  Justice is a slippery slope.  But that’s the good and decent slippery slope that needs to happen.  Through logic, I see how those who defended slavery and stood against voting rights for minorities and women were on the wrong side of justice.  Those who stood against interracial marriage were on the wrong side of justice.  In 50 years, people will wonder why so many in the early 21st century stood on the wrong side of justice.  Just like those defending injustice decades ago, they used God and the Bible as their reasoning (yet continued to eat bacon-wrapped shrimp).

For Martin Luther King, Jr. said “The arc of the universe is long but it bends towards justice.”

Join me on this side of the arc of justice.  If you haven’t had the chance to get to know LGBT people around you, I highly suggest it.  They will bless your lives in new ways.  Listen to their stories.  Hear the struggles they’ve endured.  Know that God will be presence as you listen to each.

I feel that writing this is a bit of a risk.  But, in this life, I feel the necessity to share God’s overflowing love.  That’s the love that brings connection and understanding.  And how wonderful of a world it would be if we could experience this in one another!

I thank all of you who have open my eyes to new types of love.  Let’s keep love outside of the box today, this Valentine’s Day and throughout the year.