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Michelle L. Torigian

~ God Goes Pop Culture

Michelle L. Torigian

Category Archives: Church Life

Cutting Evangelism

06 Friday Oct 2017

Posted by mictori in Church Life, Pop

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Tags

church marketing, evangelism, Good News, layoffs, marketing, non profit, pr, public relations, Social Justice, social media, UCC, United Church of Christ

pexels-photo-388898

A couple of days ago, we got word that my denomination, the United Church of Christ, was going to engage in additional cuts to jobs as they were restructuring departments.  It broke our hearts that many of our colleagues with whom we’ve worked closely would be no longer be partners in our journey together.

Word has been released that many of the positions cut focused on communications and publishing.  I had worked with some of these amazing staff members on various projects, and it saddened me to know that they would no longer sharing their talents with the denomination.

Now, I understand that there isn’t as much money flowing upward to the denomination.  With each of our churches growing smaller, individual congregation are not able to send as much money to the denomination, and the current structure is not sustainable.  I can imagine that these choices were extremely distressing to the decision-makers who are faithful people yearning to always make the best decisions possible for the denomination.

But I also know this: with less people attending church, the materials published by the denomination is a primary way for us to communicate and spread the good news of God’s love, grace, and acceptance.  I know cuts needed to come from somewhere, but I am saddened that this is the department that is receiving drastic cuts.

I started out as a PR person in my younger days.  I worked for non-profit organizations, sending out press releases, crafting newsletters, finding additional ways to spread the word about our message and mission.  This year, I was working a few hours per week for a local non-profit.  When restructuring was done for that organization earlier in the summer, my position was cut as well.  (I still work full-time as a local church pastor but last year was offered an additional part time job utilizing my PR skills.)

So with marketing and communications cuts by all types of non-profits, we are slashing efforts to send out any good news into our world.

Evangelism (or PR and communications for God) is one of our calls as people of faith.  Evangelism isn’t our efforts to convince people to believe what we believe but to simply spread the word about God’s unconditional love and grace.

Mark 16:15 notes that Jesus said to his followers “‘Go into all the world and proclaim the good news to the whole creation.”  We too are given this directive – whether by our preaching, our teaching, our mission and justice work, or our writing.

I know that the people who remain in the department are remarkable, and they will use their gifts to their full potential.  But recognizing that 21st century Church is mostly being done beyond each of our local church walls, I still need to ask: are one or two or three people in our organization enough to share this radical message of love and justice?

So progressive Christian writer friends – this is a call for us to find new mediums or create new avenues to share the good news.  With marketing, communications, and church continuously evolving, let’s ensure that we are continuously sharing our gifts in these areas as a primary goal instead of burying these talents outside of our shrinking congregations.

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A Post-Synod Prayer

06 Thursday Jul 2017

Posted by mictori in Church Life, Pop

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Tags

Church, General Assembly, pastor, Prayer, returning home, UCC, UCC General Synod, UCC General Synod 31, uccgs

IMG_2166.JPG

God who fits into the spaces that seem too small to exist,
The demon of exhaustion has embedded into my soul after the past week.
What a gathering of our denomination with its highs and lows!
Gathering information. And more information. Wrestling with your call, Dear Holy.
Knowing that we all have so much work to do.

Now we are home.
Now we resume everyday life.
Now we try to infuse the ideal into the normal,
To marry the theoretical and practical-
If that is possible.

God of all connections and spaces,
I miss my friends,
My support, my kin.
Like the disciples, we have scattered across the miles-
From California to Connecticut and beyond.

So here in the silence of everyday life,
I give thanks for the extraordinary days,
The exciting conversations,
The laughs that lasted for hours,
And the friendships that will last forever.
Amen.

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A Communion Liturgy for Pentecost

01 Thursday Jun 2017

Posted by mictori in Church Life, Holidays, Liturgy, Pop

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Communion, Liturgy, Music, Pentecost, progressive Christianity

dark-fire-hot-black

Service of Communion

Invitation

One: Come to this table
Where bread and cup are transformed by the Spirit of God
Into a meal of love and grace
A supper of visions and dreams
A table where all souls are welcome.

Prayer of Communion

Loving God
Whose Divine Lungs exhaled the Spirit into our World
Your breath continues to transform our world
From the still to the stirring.

Before the earth was formed
The Spirit of God swirled through voids and shadows.

As humans were created
The air of God filled the lungs of Adam
And the soul of Eve.

This Divine Air
Continues to fill us up
When our bones are dry and spirits are sluggish.

On this day of Pentecost
When we celebrate the breath of the Spirit coming upon the disciples
We invite the Spirit to come upon these elements.

God of winds, pour out your Spirit to make the elements come alive for us.
Make this meal awaken our sleepy hearts and stagnant souls.

May this time of eating and drinking be one
where we stir from our sadness and rise from our hopelessness.

May we begin to celebrate visions
And animate the dreams that have only been alive in our minds.

As we share this meal,
Let us remember our siblings in faith who came to this table

In decades and centuries past
And our children who will surround this table in the future.
Each generation uniquely celebrates your presence, Spirit of Life.

The night before Jesus died was a solemn time around the table.
Breaking bread.  Drinking from the cup.
Jesus asking to remember him in our eating and drinking.

There was a time to mourn followed by a time to dance.

After the day of resurrection
The disciples ate on the beach with the risen Christ
Celebrating new life, new hope, new vitality.

On this Pentecost, as we come to the table,
let us celebrate the Spirit of Resurrection
And the promise of a needed second-wind in our own lives.

Let us partake of this celebratory meal together.

Distribution of Elements

Unison Prayer of Thanksgiving

Spirit of God, who fed the multitudes, provided the manna in the wilderness, and blessed the elements, we give great thanks for the meal eaten and the company surrounding us.

Inspire us as we move forward this day and encourage us to transform our dreams into reality.  Amen.

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When Cheesecake Is More Than Cheesecake

15 Monday May 2017

Posted by mictori in Church Life, Holidays, Life, Pop, Single in the Sanctuary

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

child-free, Childless, Childlessness, Church, Infertility, Mother's Day, motherhood

cheesecake picToday, Mother’s Day 2017, I went to lunch with some people from church.  I was the only non-mom female adult in the group.

It was wonderful catching up and spending time with this group of people.  When the end of the meal came, the other women at the table received a free piece of cheesecake.

I did not.

Now, I was planning on spending my dessert calories elsewhere in the day (as I had a free coupon for a sundae that I was looking forward to).  While the cheesecake looked delicious, I wasn’t as disappointed that I wasn’t eating cheesecake as much as what that cheesecake represented.

That dessert represented the haves and the have nots when it comes to family structures.

I continue to claim the status of somewhere between childhood and childfree.  Most days, I am content with not having children, I suppose.  While 360 days of the year I’m fine (or have, at least, convinced myself I am fine) not having children, certain holidays roll around each year, reminding me of what I don’t have.

For instance, there’s Christmas morning in which I don’t have children waking me up, excited about getting presents.  Then there’s Easter Day, when families all sit together with children beaming from the Easter Bunny excitement.

And it feels like a knife cuts into my soul.

I was already having a rough day due to what Mother’s Day means to me: a day representing dreams that didn’t happen.  Each year, I never expect it to impact me as it does until the day rolls around and I’m dealing with aches in my heart every time I see photos of friends with their children, knowing that isn’t the same path my life took.

There’s the primary source of sadness and grief: not having children.  But when a piece of cake comes out for all of the other women at your table, you realize that your path is so very different from the path of your sisters, and grieve a secondary loss of being looked over by society.

And that’s why I encourage churches to take an inclusive approach to this holiday by praying for all women on Mother’s Day – the ones with children and the ones who face childlessness.  We pray for the ones beaming with joy and the ones who would rather not come to church on this Sunday.

Many women refused to go to churches on Mother’s Day because of the glorification mothers receive.  At the church I serve, we recognize that Mother’s Day is about being a mother and being part of the process of mothering.  All women (and all people) fit into the latter category as it really does take a village to raise children.

I’m pleased to be one of many pastors who is bringing a new inclusive way of recognizing Mother’s Day to churches.

I just wish restaurants would catch up…

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Ash Wednesday and Human Fragility

02 Thursday Mar 2017

Posted by mictori in Church Life, Current Events, Health, Pop

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Tags

Ash Wednesday, ashes, Clergy, clergy self-care, dust, Endometriosis, endometriosis awareness month, endoperson, Endosisters, fragility, Grace, Healing, laparoscopy, mortality, post laparoscopy, post-laparoscopy reflection, progressive Christianity, recovery, self-care, stage 2

imageToday, I was reminded of my fragility.

It didn’t happen at an Ash Wednesday service.  I wish I could have led one today, immersing my thumb in oil and ashes, looking into the eyes of fellow humans, and reminding them that we come from dust and we will head back there again later in our lives.

Instead, I got my own Ash Wednesday lesson in the form of pain, shots, and a nod to my human frailness from a nurse practitioner.

As I’ve mentioned on this blog a few times recently, I had surgery for my endometriosis.  While I was expecting the recover to go much like it did last time (SWIFT!), unfortunately, the amount of endometriosis and adhesions were greater so more tissue needed to be removed.  That usually means that recovery will reflect the heightened intensity of my endometriosis and what needed to be done during the surgery.

I didn’t return to work on Tuesday.  The pain was bad.  I had a low-grade fever.  And because of all of the discomfort, I met with the nurse practitioner in at the doctor’s office.  Tarodol shot #1 happend on Tuesday, but it didn’t help much.

Sleep was restless, but I was going to be a delusional hero and push through.  Even as late as Wednesday morning, I was intending to go to the Ash Wednesday service.  Earlier in the day, I was still in pain, having problems sleeping and then needing to sleep.  I called back into the doctor for a third day in a row.  They urged me to come back in for my second Tarodol shot in two days for the pain.

While in the office, I saw the nurse practitioner.  Reflecting on our conversation from Tuesday, she noted that I needed to take the extra time to rest.  “For the first surgery, taking one week off to recover makes sense.  For your twenty-fifth surgery (she meant third), you need a couple of weeks.”

Noooooooooooooo!

Laparoscopic surgeries for endometriosis aren’t like knee or shoulder surgeries.  You don’t have wraps or slings or crutches.  Under my shirts and comfy stretch drawstring pants are three fresh scars.  That’s all I see, and others don’t see any of that.  So I don’t look that bad.  And I still don’t know what my insides looked like during the surgery.  I’ll see pictures next week.  In the meantime, I just see three healing scars.  And what I forget is that I may have healed well on the outside, but my internal cells, tissue, and organs are trying to achieve full restoration. .

I look back at my previous laparoscopic experiences.  After my first laparoscopic surgery for endometriosis at the age of 30, I had a long weekend to recover.  Thursday was the surgery, and I was back to work on Monday.  Frankly, I wasn’t ready to return to work, but I mastered the art of pushing myself even when I was sick.

For the second surgery at 39, I took a week – maybe a week and a day.  Like the first surgery, I was still stage 2 endometriosis.

This surgery at the age of 43 – We are going on one week and two days.  I’m not 30 anymore, and based on the report of many adhesions, I’m probably beyond stage 2 endometriosis (the stage diagnosed during the first two surgeries).

Thankfully, my wonderful ecumenical colleagues in ministry were able to lead the service tonight without my presence.  This came in the form of a group email giving me grace and the permission to rest.

Ash Wednesday in pain.  And so I thought to myself out loud in a Tweet:

Feeling weakness & pain as I recover from surgery are all the ashes I need to remind me of fragility & mortality. #AshWednesday

— Michelle Torigian (@mictori) March 1, 2017

My pain and my inability to live fully on Ash Wednesday were more symbolic than any ash could give me.  I’m limited.  I’m mortal.  I’m fragile.  I can’t keep going the way I normally do right now because my human body is healing.  I need help.  God knows this.  Other humans know this.

Why can’t I accept this?

Sigh.

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Advent Prayer Day 12: A Prayer for the Tired Pastors

08 Thursday Dec 2016

Posted by mictori in Church Life, Pop, Religion

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Advent, Christmas, exhausted, pastor, pastors, Prayer, prayer for tired pastors, tired, tired pastors

tiredGod from whom all energy flows,
Our bodies crawl from dawn to dusk
From one visit to another,
From one meeting to the next,
From one worship service to the following one,
From one duty until our list is complete.

(It’s never complete.)

We know our help comes from you.
And our strength and courage are bestowed upon us by you.
Yet, our stamina wavers
And we wonder where you are.

Grant that our tired bodies
And even-more-exhausted souls
Find their refreshment in sleep, in recreation,  and in times of fellowship.

May we learn to prioritize what is needed
And let us find the grace we need when certain tasks remain incomplete.

May our spouses and partners and parents and children understand our frenzy.
May our friends continue to invite us to parties even thou we’ve turned them down four times before.

May our bodies remain strong,
May the flus and infections stay far away,
May additional unforeseen tasks that may pop up wait until January,
And may we see the Christ around us even when our eyes are focused elsewhere.

Amen.

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Not an Anomaly: Progressive Christians in Your Midst

23 Wednesday Nov 2016

Posted by mictori in Church Life, Current Events, Life, Pop, Pop Culture, Religion, Social Justice

≈ 10 Comments

Tags

Election 2016, Hopelessness, liberal, liberal Christianity, liberal Christians, Pantsuit Nation, progressive Christianity

hideFor many years, I was led to believe that there was only one way of being Christian.  This way would focus on specific issues like abortion, who is allowed to get married, who isn’t allowed to have sex, and who will be granted eternity in heaven.

As time went on, I realized I never really identified with this flavor of Christianity.  It was too bitter: condemning anyone who didn’t fit into their moral code.  It reflected a sour that first appears as sweet.  People invited you to their church which held certain strong perspectives – some bragging about being baptized or born again.  All wanting you to join and change the way you are living.

Very little of the greatest commandment was discussed in these churches.  Sure, there was a lot of implicit “love God” as they spoke of their devotion to Jesus.  But loving neighbor was the null.  It was hidden from their theology. In some cases, it had been discretely removed from the church altogether.  Needless to say, hypocrisy was a dominant force in turning me away from the Church during my twenties.

For me, I needed to worship in a place who would accept my views – even if people didn’t have the same perspectives.  I needed a church which valued my individuality and, at the same time, encouraged us to be in covenant with one another even in our differences.

Hypocrisy and negativity may have challenged me to switch churches and even denominations in my early 30’s.  I could no longer fit my square self into the round hole my church had become.  While shame raged within me, I walked away from the congregation – moving towards something new.  For me, that was being part of the United Church of Christ.

Yet as part of my call to ministry, I knew I had to talk louder than the voices of condemnation and hypocrisy and present another side: one of grace and love.  For many years now, I feel called to present Christianity in even more unconventional and heretical ways.  I believe this is to witness to a more loving and more grace-filled faith.

A few days before the US General Election of 2016, I became a member of a (not so) secret online society called Pantsuit Nation.  Some of the threads presented in the group include wrestle with their progressive Christian faith.  They feel like they are an island as progressive Christians.  They wonder if they can reconcile themselves and their political perspectives while still having a relationship with God.

My answer: Yes, we can.  We can be liberal in our views of politics and faith.  And God still has a place for us here on earth and here in heaven.  There is a community of faith somewhere for you, and through this community, you will be able to realize that you are not alone in your faith journey.

There are so many of us online, in faith communities and in your neighborhoods.  You are not alone in your perspectives.  And your perspective matters.

Now is the time for us, progressive Christian friends, to speak aloud of what it means to be a progressive person of faith.  Now is the time for us to talk of our struggles to find churches that align with our way of thinking.  Now is the time for us to speak of our justice work, how being pro-choice does not mean you are pro-abortion, how all marital statuses should be respected and how marriage equality does reflect the love of Christ.  Now is the time for us to speak to how our faith leads us to affirm black lives matter, women’s bodies matter, Muslim religious freedom matters, the dignity of people who are disabled matters, the equality of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer people matters, immigrants well-being matters.

When we are able to affirm the lives and livelihoods of our sisters and brothers who may find themselves in the margins, people are able to see the Christ in our midst with more clarity.

People are looking for us and our churches.  Are we brave enough to shout the good news of God’s love and acceptance to all people, even in the face of hate?

 

 

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Single in the Sanctuary -The 50th That Never Will Be

02 Tuesday Aug 2016

Posted by mictori in Church Life, Life, Pop, Single in the Sanctuary

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Tags

50th, 50th anniversary, Anna, Anna the prophetess, divorce, divorced, Luke 2, marriage, married, Single, single in the sanctuary, Singlehood, wedding anniversary

single balloonThere’s a moment in many of our lives when you realize you probably may not celebrate your 50th wedding anniversary.

I’m 43 years old.  Granted, I could live to 95 or 100.  But that is banking on both people in the couple living to 95 or 100.  The average life expectancy is 79.68 here in the United States.  My oldest grandparents were nearly 86 when they died.  I would be ecstatic to live until 86, but that would mean I would “only” have a 35- or 40- year marriage, for which I would be blessed.

And still – not a 50-year marriage.

Our society as well as our churches get excited when we see couples celebrating their 50th, 60th and even 70th anniversaries.  We herald it as the way to live, as the optimal lifestyle.

But what about the people whose lives were turned over by one spouse’s death?  What happens to the wife who needs to leave her husband because the marriage is abusive?  What happens when the husband and wife grow apart, or when one spouse wakes up one morning and discovers their spouse is gone?  What happens to our LGBTQ friends who were only able to officially get married when they were 50, 60 or 70?  What happens to those of us who decide to take our time finding the right significant other because we want quality of years over quantity of years?

When I think of short marriages, Anna the prophetess comes to mind.  Luke 2 says that she “lived with her husband seven years after her marriage, then as a widow to the age of eighty-four.”  After the passing of Anna’s spouse, she dedicates her life to worshipping God in the temple.  Anna’s is a life worth celebrating.  Her seven year marriage was worth celebrating.  The decades of unmarried life is worth celebrating because they were spent answering God’s call.

We should still ABSOLUTELY celebrate anniversaries – like we merrily recognize birthdays and other life milestones and everything happy in life.  But we should not necessarily place quantity of years married at the top of life’s ideal.  Instead, we should place happy and healthy marriages – even short ones – as the goal of marriage (for those who feel called to get married).  We should place our own physical, mental and spiritual health and safety above what society thinks about the length of marriage.  We should place our own calls – whether to be single or married – over one particular ideal marital status.  We should marry when we feel ready to marry, not fitting ourselves into our world’s expectations.

Guess what?  This means many people will never celebrate a 50th wedding anniversary.  And that’s ok.

Churches: It’s our job to make sure that everyone is celebrated whatever they’ve achieved or milestones they have reached.  But we shouldn’t just value long marriages.  We should value relationships that are healthy.  We are called to value people of all marital statuses.  Let us celebrate all of our congregants wherever they are at in their lives and whatever they desire to celebrate.

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Pokémon Go, Reloading and Sabbaths

12 Tuesday Jul 2016

Posted by mictori in Church Life, Life, Pop, Pop Culture, Social Media

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Cincinnati, Colerain Township, Pokémon, Pokémon Go, PokéStop, progressive Christianity, Reloading, Remember the Sabbath, Sabbath, St. Paul UCC, St. Paul United Church of Christ

image

Apparently, our church is a Pokémon Go PokéStop.

What does this mean?  While I’m new to the game, I believe a PokéStop is a location where people can reload on supplies they need to capture the monsters.

My church, St. Paul United Church of Christ in Colerain Township, Cincinnati, is a PokéStop.  At first, I didn’t know this, and I’m not exactly sure how we became one.  After watching a few new people walking around our church building and then installing the app myself, I can indeed confirm that we are a PokéStop.

While church may not be a destination for younger people, PokéStops are.  So how can we merge virtual life and spiritual life into one location?

Remember the Sabbath.

Times and spaces to reload are important for all people.  Some choose faith communities.  Others choose sporting activities, arts or fellowship activities.  These are activities that give something back to our souls.

Church was already a PokéStop in the game of life.  It has been and should always be a place in which we can recharge our batteries and reload on spiritual energy for the new week.  Sometimes we get away from the idea that Sabbath is for reloading on spiritual fuel.  While we may come to church to give to God, we are also finding supplies for our soul.  God gave us the Sabbath for us to find renewal.  As Jesus says in Mark 2, “The Sabbath was made for humankind, and not the humankind for Sabbath.”

In our time of reloading, or Sabbath, may wee all see God a little clearer, each other with more love, and find spiritual supplies to help us manage life throughout the week.

 

 

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Eating and Drinking to Remembering

24 Thursday Mar 2016

Posted by mictori in Church Life, Life, Pop

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Tags

grief, Jesus, Maundy Thursday, progressive Christianity

image

From Fontbonne University’s Fontbanner, 1993

 

Back in college, Lisa, one of my closest friends, and I both worked on the school’s newspaper. Before each issue, we would go to the local restaurant, dine together and then write our individual sections of a restaurant review.

There were many times in which we joined together for a bite to eat or drink on a Friday. Lisa was the one who introduced me to strawberry margaritas and various eating establishments around the greater St. Louis area, whether it was for an assignment or just to catch up on our weeks.

Four years ago today, she died of cancer.

I couldn’t make it home for her memorial service. Instead, I went to the Mexican restaurant down the street and had a strawberry margarita in her memory.

To me, that’s a good portion of what the communion table is about. It gives us a chance to get together and have a meal in remembrance of Jesus the Christ. With somber joy, we recall his story and how we relate to the Christ in our midst today.

While I didn’t have a chance to drink a strawberry margarita today in remembrance of my friend Lisa, I did join with others at the table tonight, Maundy Thursday, to remember the Christ and Jesus’ love of humanity.

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